December 10, 2008


There is a Peggy Lee song that I consider to be my theme song: “I’m a Woman.”  

I can scrub this old house til it is shinin like a dime/Feed the baby, grease the car, and powder my face at the same time/Get all dressed up, go out and swing til 4am and then/Lay down at 5, jump up at 6, and start all over again/’Cause I’m a woman, W-O-M-A-N, I will say it again.

I am proud of my ability to multi-task.  I am proud of the fact that I can take care of the baby, do some work, post to a blog, cook all the baby food, etc.  Sometimes I feel like a superhero.  But not today.  Today I missed the multi-tasking boat and M fell off the bed.

I have never in my life felt so sad and guilty.  The poor little guy was fine.  But, man, did it shake me.  It had been coming.  He is so active and increasingly mobile (crawling and working on walking) and I think my brain just hadn’t switched yet to thinking of him that way.  That has changed.

After all was said and done (panicked call to my mother, panicked call to the doctor, fight with the husband, checking the baby’s pupils, etc.) and I knew he was going to be ok I thought, “Wow. This is totally not something I would share with a mom’s group.”  

How f’ed up is that?!  Isn’t that the sort of thing you should be able to to share with other moms?  So that they reassure you that they have done it too.  But in this wacked-out, competitive environment, you are constantly seeking to prove you are the best parent with the best kid.  Well, no more.  I am going to share my multi-tasking/parenting failure with the world!  I am going to be the model of post-modern parenting- rejecting all overparenting, competitiveness, and need for perfection.  I am going to be the best post-modern parent ever.


3 Responses to “Multi-Tasking”

  1. Michelle Says:

    Don’t worry. My baby fell off the bed last week. He was fine too, but it’s crazy scary! Don’t beat yourself up over it. I think it happens to all of us at least once (and probably more than that!) So here’s to lack of perfection and post-modern parenting! 🙂

  2. tamarchansky Says:

    love the spirit of this, and glad (of course) that your baby is fine. You will take longer to recover– parents always do.

    and great reframe! by embracing rather than hiding the mistake here, you are freeing yourself up from so much strife!

    Tamar Chansky

  3. Mad-Dog's Mama Says:

    Oh I wish you had called me– I’m the mom whose kid runs all over the playground, climbs up onto a toy for a 5 year old, and then falls on the pavement and cuts her face under her eye. Furthermore, I am then the mom who cleans the cut, sees it’s superficial, announces to the onlooking horrified playground parents and caretakers (both the real ones and the ones in my head) “she cried right away, so she’s fine” and then sets her back down to play. Hey, I’m a nurse, I should know, right? (sigh…)
    Moral of the story: bumps, falls, scrapes and owies are part of being an adventurous and increasingly mobile kid. And NOT considering them a personal failure is an immeasurably important part of being a parent.

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