Death to Snoozie

January 8, 2009

I had an amazing insight this morning into why so many couples get divorced in the first five years of marriage.  The snooze button.

snooze_button

The snooze button has always been a source of contention in my relationship with my husband.  When we first started dating he had an alarm clock on his side of the bed and I had one on mine.  But what that really meant was that the alarm would go off on his side of the bed and he would keep on sleeping until I hit him in the arm and told him, “turn off the alarm!”  He’d hit snooze and nine minutes later it would happen again.  And again.  And again.  After a number of ugly mornings the alarm clock on his side of the bed went.

And it has not been pretty since then either.  But the true ugliness has come out since the arrival of the baby.

See, my husband still insists on snoozing at least twice.  Which means I have to be woken by the alarm clock to tell him that it is time to get up.  Which means I lose precious sleep.  Which means I am then Super Bitch.  And this morning I realized that while he is too sound asleep to hear the alarm going off, he is not too tired to compute the number of minutes ahead the clock has been set and, therefore, how much longer that means he has to sleep.  Criminal.

So I say, death to the snooze button! Snooze buttons should be banned in all households with small children. Who knows how many marriages we might save.

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